Kgaugelo’s Weblog

Archive for October 2008

I do not want to die… until I have faithfully made the most of my talent and cultivated the seed that was placed in me until the last small twig has grown.
Kathe Kollwitz, O Magazine, September 2002

I had great weekend with my girls… I partied like there is no tomorrow and had so much fun but one thing I realised is how much I appreciate my close friends here at Rhodes. They have been there for me throughout this year and I’m grateful. It’s a pity most are leaving but it’s cool our paths will mos def cross.  Now it’s time I studied for exams… really don’t feel like it but it’s gotta be done especially if I want to get my degree… I have seven papers all in all and then in 20 days I’ll be in my baby’s arms… Ah I miss him so much…

To achieve great things we must live as though we were never going to die.
Marquis de Vauvenargues

God is good and His love endureth forever!! I just got into my fourth year specialisation New Media y’all… ah my day could not end on a more happier note…I’m spilling over with joy and tears are streaming down my face because there were times were though maybe I won’t make it… but here I am saying… I actually made it…. and it was not by my strength nor might but by the man upstairs.

I have been dreaming about this day to come and it’s finally here- it feels like I’m in living in a dream-someone pinch me please! My gosh this feeling is incredible. The feeling of… thinking I got in. I got through three years of varsity and finally got into new media… ahh I feel like screamimg from the top of my lungs because my majors Drama 3 and Journ 3 are not subjects that a weak character must take on, you must know your eish, be focused and plan well in advance! At times crying and shying away from work doesn’t work, everyday I’d tell myself to pull it together.

Of course, mommy dearest is THE PERSON I should thank for helping me push this far. If it wasn’t for my moms encouragement then I probably would’ve dropped out-thanks mommy, really I know it’s been hard paying fees every year and making sure my dreams of getting a university education come true. This woman has sacrificed so much. I remember  when I would go back home for vacs and there would be no grocery in the fridge because my mom made sure I come back home safe and sound via plane. She’s been selfless and one day I pray that I turn out like her. I pray that I can repay all that she’s invested in me. When I graduate in 2010 I’ll be doing it for her, no one else. I want to be the first grandchild to get a university degree and make my mother proud!

Another person whom I should mention, has made me dream bigger than big. He is the love of my life, my man. He makes me stretch my faith to the furtherest ends. He inspires me to be the best I can be and he has been there for the past three years encouraging and edifying me through and through. He asked me out two months before coming to Rhodes and I can’t believe that we’ve made it this far. This December we celebrate our third year anniversary…ahh I’m wiping tears from my cheeks because has supported me even though at times things seemed impossible, he stood in the gap for me and believed in my dreams. There are very few guys out there like my man and I appreciate him so much!

“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable”. Christopher Reeve

My dream has become inevitable. Now I feel like I can just start and be thrown into the deep end…. ah the sleepless nights, no social life, working weekends, adrenaline rush… ah music to my ears! I can’t wait. I wish my exams and vac could fast forward so I can get into it….Now, since I’ve made it into my specialisation, I need to start thinking where I’ll be working and for which company…hmmm luckily I’ve got my internship with the Times Multimedia team secured for Dec so I’ll see from there. But ag let me live in the moment, I’ll think about the ‘life after new media’ next week…* sigh* It’s done now… all done! Thank you Lord!!!!!!

Victory belongs to the most persevering.

Napoleon Bonaparte
French general & politician (1769 – 1821)

The reason most people never reach their goals is that they don’t define them, or ever seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them.
Denis Watley

The past 3 months or so I’ve been slightly anxious especially about my academics and my degree. I left high school having planned to do journalism and media studies and when I arrived at varsity I fell in love with New Media. I didn’t know what was in it-I was just drawn to it and as time went by I really started being obsessed by this specialisation, I mean I look at cnn’s website, the times multimedia portal and many others, and I’d go absolutely crazy. I believe new media is an innovative field within the media industry, it’s fresh, exciting, thought-provoking and I believe it will take journalism to new heights in terms of reporting and giving a voice to the voiceless in this evolving world we live in. I really see myself doing this but moreover owning a multimedia empire before the age of 35 [and mothering nations-want to build shelters for broken women and orphans together with my husband].

So many people look down on this Benoni girl and they do not know what I possess. However, it has not been smooth sailing- I’ve had to work three times harder than most students just to where I am and the competition has been rough but I’m proud to say that I’m 6 weeks away from attaining my degree and nothing will stop me.  I find comfort in these words, “We find no real satisfaction or happiness in life without obstacles to conquer and goals to achieve”, because I feel the obstacles that have come my way have made me even stronger. So even though there is a hectic process of applying into specialisations here at school, which by the way only 8 are chosen from 120 students who apply for new media, I’m still confident that I will get whatsoever I long for.

The reason why I’m so sure about this is, is because I know all will be alright, whether or not I get in. All has been mapped and planned out for me-my days are ordained so I’m not going to worry myself sick about my future but rather, I’m going to be at peace with myself and press forward for the goal which lies ahead of me. I know I will eventually get there and there are many doors out there, not just one.  As soon as I realised this my anxieties and struggles within my heart were settled and I gained the utmost confidence to keep pushing-work hard, finish my undergrad and move on to my next chapter of my life and eventually own my multimedia company. I’m feeling excited about it because I’m not limiting myself. Things are going to get bigger and better. So watch this space…

The victory of success is half won when one gains the habit of setting goals and achieving them. Even the most tedious chore will become endurable as you parade through each day convinced that every task, no matter how menial or boring, brings you closer to fulfilling your dreams. Og Mandino (1923 – 1996)

The idea of an election is much more interesting to me than the election itself…The act of voting is in itself the defining moment.

Jeff Melvoin, Northern Exposure, Democracy in America, 1992

I found this cool PSA and I wondered if us South Africans will ever have something like this? People can be so apathetic about things, especially things like voting, I for one fall under that category. I know it’s wrong but like many young people out there voting seems like a shlurp especially if the people who make up the cabinet are “bad apples” and I do put that in quotation marks because not all of them are like that. We can sort of tell where we going to end up and whether or not the ANC will win again. However, as from today I’m going to change my ways because for some reason our country’s future seems bright with Kgalema Motlanthe as our interim president, in any case I think our country is in safe hands-we’ve got intellectual individuals running it and God by our side. So I’m happy with that and not at all worried about the state of affairs of this country-everything will work itself out… Check the PSA out and tell me what you think.

Storms make oaks take deeper root.
George Herbert
English clergyman & metaphysical poet (1593 – 1633)

It has been long since I’ve blogged, I do apologise. The madness of being at varsity is just too much, I hardly have time for myself let alone my friends. Things are hectic and not getting any easier it’s like they [my lecturers] want to make sure that when I leave this place with my degree I must have tears of both joy and sorrow… Exams are looming and I’m feeling a bit anxious, I’ve come up with about two plans and I still don’t feel like I’m on top of things but I’ll keep pushing, I’m no eager beaver for nothing, “they don’t call me die hard for nothing”… On a serious note I will leave with what I came to get, what belongs to me, no matter what the costs are, no matter the sleepless nights and the tears… My Bjourn degree will be mine whether they like it or not. And I can honestly say (like Louisa May Alcott) that “I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship”. Check you later…

October 2008